The Secret To Your Dream Body Without Doing Any Work!!!

 

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… the fitness industry is full of false promises. Maybe you can join me for a little vent? Warning: I get a little mad.

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If you have recently bought anything that promises to get you ripped in minutes, you might as well STOP reading cause I’m about to go on about what a douche you are.

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I’m always dumbfounded at the amount of products there are that offer the “latest” on fat loss or muscle building.

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“Lose 20lbs in 20 days!”

” prevent fat gain while bingeing (X-mas, holidays, weekends)”

” increase fat-loss 300% with a few bags of ice”

” gain 34 pounds of muscle in 28 days, without steroids, and in four hours of total gym time”

“sleep 2 hours per day and feel fully rested”

“How to produce 15-minute female orgasms”

” triple testosterone and double sperm count”

” add 150+ pounds to your lifts in 6 months”

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I actually pulled some of these from a live website!  My personal favorite? I LOVE how they slipped the “produce a 15 minute female orgasm” in there… like the woman has nothing to do with it! But hey if you’re willing to buy the other crap, then you’re definitely the kind of person who needs help in the sac. haha! Please consider: We’re selling here! So there will be no rules!!

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Did you know that there is 3500 calories in a pound of stored cellulose ? Did you know that it is physiologically impossible to gain 15lbs of lean mass in one year(as an adult without anabolic steroids)? Did you know that the American College of Sports Medicine recommends 5 hours a week of vigorous activity? How are these marketing asshats going to tell you with a straight face that you can do it in less??

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The way I see it, if you are only drawn to exercise by these fly by night shysters that will take your money in monthly installments, and promise the body of a thunder god in minutes, then you probably deserve less money.

 

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Please feel vindicated in the fact that you are not alone. In fact, you are the majority… I may be the one who is alone… BUT… I am alone with the real secret for achieving your dream body. And, No it can’t be done in 4 hours. But really, why would you want to? It’s the journey not the destination.

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I think the entire fitness industry is built around selling promises that don’t work,  together with a 30 day money back guarantee. The reason is simple. It’s an industry worth 1.6 billion dollars in Canada. That’s more than we spend on film( I know this because I am also an actor, and believe me, I wish we spent more on film).

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When you get done with all the false promises and finally realize that there is no physiological way to look like a fitness model without endless hours in the gym(and a seriously restrictive diet), please take this advice…. These are the REAL secrets…

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Real secret #1: NOTHING WITHOUT SIDE EFFECTS WORKS

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There’s no pill; powder; machine or; reference material that you can purchase that will increase your lean tissue and reduce fat faster or better than proper training and a strong diet. With the exeption of performance enhancing drugs. Performance enhancing drugs work like magic. But they leave you with side effects. A drug by definition has at least 80 different side effects. For more on this message me.

A proper diet where you are meeting your protein, vitamin and fiber requirements will go farther to getting you to your goal than anything you can buy at a supplement store. It’s just a difficult thing to do. And it takes time… Like the mighty oak that grows in the meadow…. In a perfect world you can expect to put on between 5 and 7 lbs of lean mass per year. That’s if you are commited to your diet and your training is superlative… and you are 17. This is not a bad thing! imagine 7 lbs of steak on your kitchen counter. That is enough for one year, trust me. When you consider the average human  male has 65 lbs of lean muscle, the addition of 10-20% a year seems acceptable.

The problem is that the industry wants to tell you that it can be done in weeks. This is just the kind of lies that keeps the whole industry going.

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Real Secret #2: LEARN TO LOVE IT!(this is the most important rule)

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Man, I wish there was a way to bottle the love I have for a good training session in the gym! I’d be way richer than Guthie/Ranker or Joe Weider. I won’t bore you with my enthusiasm. But it is high. I’ve been a gym rat for 24+ years. I got my first gym membership when Iwas 14(YMCA on Kent st. in Ottawa).  I got my first set of weights when I was 10. I respond to stress in life with my training. If it is sunny and 25 outside and there has not been sunshine in months, I still go to the gym! When I am on vacation, I go to the gym every day. I fuckin love it more than anything short of my wife! I cannot imagine a time when I would choose to work out less! Even if it meant I could win the Olympia; Tour de France and; the Iron Man Hawaii on consecutive weeks!!! I love to workout. Okay I bored you after all.  I slipped an eff word in there.

Why in the world would I want to conform to a program that promises less gym time?? As long as you are not overdoing it, and getting plenty of rest, why would anyone want to stop doing what they love?

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But some people don’t love exercise. Some people hate it. Some people think they “have to”, and they go hire a personal trainer and purchase a px90. And they do it for three months. And then they stop. Its too hard and they are not seeing results. Or they are, and figure they can stop now.

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WOW!! `

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One of my gurus is Andre Noel Potvin. He’s smart. Way smarter then me. You should train with him if you ever get a chance. Anyway what he says is: “We are primates. We are designed to protect ourselves in order to survive.” Somewhere along the lines of human evolution it became possible to survive without moving. This really stinks. And the truth may be that you don’t have to move much. And if that’s the case…. too bad for you. You probably have tattoos and smoke(more to come on that…).

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“But Ryan Booth, trainer to the stars, what do you recommend for we- the sad ones- who just don’t like to work out??”

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You’ve seen those frat movies where a kid is petitioning for membership at “fi cappa ball suck” at any given college?   The kid gets his ass paddled and says: “thank-you, sir may I have another?”… Well, do you think that kid is having a good time?? No. But he sure is faking it well…. sort of….

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YOU MUST LOVE YOUR TRAINING!!

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We are designed to move. good things happen in our brains when we move. The rewards for movement are amazing! Yet some people resist and to them I relay: “THANK-YOU,SIR MAY I HAVE ANOTHER!”

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Simply put, fake it till you make it.

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If you don’t love your training, pretend that you do. All things being equal of course, if your training is some form of  self-flogging, or causes you physical pain, please stop it. There is no need to over do it either.

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Pretend that you love it and soon you will. It is important to be vigilant with this. “Sucks I have to go to the gym” and “Man I hate running” are thoughts that must be replaced. Avoid conversations with people who take energy away from your training. these people will just bring you down. Send them the link to this Blog:)

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Real Secret #3: Discipline!!

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The next thing I want to mention is discipline.

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Do you smoke? Do you have tattoos? If you smoke AND have tattoos then you have a discipline problem. Please stop reading here until you have solved at least one of these problems.

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Seriously, think of all the girls you’ve met in life who both smoke AND have tattoos( think of the boys you’ve met also… in fact… that’s better) . Were they easy or not easy? Exactly. Discipline Problem. There’s exceptions that prove the rule, but generalize with me and let’s save time.

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Maybe you haven’t heard that smoking causes lung cancer and may kill you. Maybe you haven’t heard that second hand smoke releases many carcinogens into the air that kids inhale. Maybe you have. But you still smoke. Discipline problem. If your own death and the death of others around you does not inspire you to quit, then I the last thing you need is a personal training blog. And, about tattoos: I don’t know about you, but there is nothing I want to remember and subsequently share with ink on my arm. In fact I’d pay good money to forget some stuff. And one tatto leads to another. They are addictive. Who has just one of these conversation pieces?? Nobody… Discipline.

Now, you mix smoking and tattoos together….

(beat)

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“But Ryan Booth, trainer to the stars, isn’t discipline an illusion and shouldn’t we be looking to “motivate” ourselves instead?”

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Well, I hope you can motivate yourself. ‘Cause I sure can’t motivate you. Dr. Wayne Dyer has a theory about motivating others: He’s not sure it can be done. I agree.  He recommends instead, to look for ‘inspiration’. But where do you find that? For me it’s in the gym(or ‘the grind’ or on a mountain etc.etc.etc.). You? You hate that. So… What inspires you? What inspires you to get training??

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Why not just take a small step? Jog for a minute. Then Stop. And next time you go for a jog, do a minute…twice! ALL THE TIME LIEING TO YOURSELF THAT YOU LOVE IT! Like your first beer. You hated that, if you are normal. But you probably drink it still. Why? ‘Cause it makes you feel good. Same thing here. ACT LIKE YOU LOVE IT. AND SOON YOU WILL.

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AND WHAT IS MORE(I’m in caps here so hopefully you can hear this:), YOU WILL BE HOANING YOUR DISCIPLINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You can now run for two minutes! Now build on that, slowly. Please don’t hurt yourself and blame me, because then you’ll cancel our session and I’ll question your…. THAT’S RIGHT! … DISCIPLINE!

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Better start to build your discipline. Like a sculptor chizels at stone. Better start to love working out. Or running; hiking; bobsleigh…… If you do, you will never leave it. If you don’t, you’ll keep coming and going from it. And all those products will take up more and more space in your garage.

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Real Secret#4: PEOPLE ARE WATCHING YOU

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What you do counts. How you acheive your goals will be eternally logged into the memory banks of everyone you talk to and they talk to. “So and So acheived great results with the ‘Body by Gunther Ab Slash”. How many times you heard that?

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I had an acting coach that shared this quote with me:

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“Choices are the pebbles that we throw into the pool of  life. And there ripples proceed towards infinity and touch everyone and everything. So you’d better chose with love.”

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YOUR training can inspire others to take the example from you. So really, it’s your responsibility to take this on. Really, this is your responsibilty to everyone! You don’t wanna let EVERYONE down do you? I didn’t think so.

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